Being in a Relationship

80+ of the Best Dirty Pick up Lines to Spice Things Up (NSFW)

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Dirty pick up lines aren’t just for teenagers. In fact, they’re a great way to break the ice, adding fun and spontaneity to your dating patois, whether you use them ironically or not. 

Here are 80+ to try out this weekend. Be forewarned: It’s 2024. These aren’t your grandparents’ pickup lines.

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Funny, Dirty Pick up Lines

  • Are you a movie trailer? Because I know you’ll be coming soon.
  • I need a pair of kneepads because I keep falling for you.
  • Do you have a court date? Because you have fine written all over you.
  • Are you for sale? Because I can’t wait to close the deal with you.
  • I don’t have an undergraduate degree, but I have a Master of Physical Education.
  • You’re the hottest thing I’ve ever seen in my life . . . . I want you . . . . Whoops, did I say that out loud?

Using dirty pick up lines is not about being vulgar or tasteless; it’s about being silly and having fun. They’re particularly useful on Tinder. However, if you use your funny, dirty pick up lines on the wrong lady and she shuts you right down, don’t be a d—. Just take your jokes elsewhere.

Dirty Lines to Use on Him

  • Would you consider yourself a haunted house? Because I’ll probably scream when you’re inside me.
  • Call me by my nickname, Dishes, because I want you to get me wet before you do me.
  • Call me a beaver because I want your wood.
  • Aside from being a panty dropper, what else do you do for work?
  • Am I supposed to sign for your package?
  • I’m not talking about Subway when I say I could go for a “footlong.”
  • My health specialist just informed me that I have a serious vitamin D deficiency. Want to come home with me to fix it?

A dirty pick up line can quickly turn a dull conversation with a guy into a fun, flirty, and exciting interaction, even when texting. This kind of exchange can make things more interesting because it allows you to escape the boring “interview” questions when getting to know him. 

Also, remember that these are supposed to be ridiculous; that’s what makes them fun. 

Related: Dirty Pickup Lines to Use on Guys Over Text

Dirty Lines to Use on Her

  • Do you have insurance? Because we’re smashing tonight.
  • The human body has 206 bones; would you like to make it 207?
  • Roses are red; violets are blue. I suck at poetry; get in my bed.
  • Are you a carpenter? Because you're giving me wood.
  • It’s strange that in school, all I wanted was A’s, but with you, all I want is an F.
  • Did you send the RSVP to the party in your legs yet?
  • Your body is a wonderland; what’s the price of admission?
  • When she asks, “Do you have a girlfriend?” Respond with, “I always have room for one more.”

A few caveats to dirty pick up lines: First, say the lines with confidence and conviction. Second, use them sparingly. You may give the wrong impression if you use them too often. And third, be sure to read the room. 

It’s probably not a good idea to use a dirty pick up line on a girl you like at a friend’s baby’s christening. They’re obviously NSFW, but if you need me to tell you that, it’s time to stop eating paint chips.

Naughty Pick up Lines

  • I don’t care about going down in history; I want to go down on you.
  • What’s your name again? I just want to remember what I’ll be screaming tonight.
  • I have three special talents: I can make six inches disappear in three different ways. Pick one . . . .
  • I’m a math prodigy. According to my calculations, we can add a room with a sturdy bed, subtract our clothes, and divide your legs to equal one hell of a good time.
  • Are you telekinetic? Because you just made a certain part of me move without touching it.
  • Just an FYI: I’m psychic, and we’re hooking up tonight.

You can use sexy pick up lines to avoid those boring run-of-the-mill conversation starters most people have when first meeting. Throwing in the occasional sexy pick up is a small thing that can have a big impact on how a dating prospect sees you. 

Freaky Pick up Lines

  • Are you a DNA strand? Because I can see you unzipping my genes later.
  • I’m hungry. I could go for some chicken right now. Do you have any? You don’t? I’m flexible; how about cock instead?
  • I’m not very disciplined; I think I need to be spanked more often.
  • I’m undergoing intense training and preparation to become an astronaut, and the first mission I’ve committed to is exploring Uranus.
  • I heard you like sports. Want to come back to my place for a session of the indoor Olympics?
  • If I were an English professor, I’d rearrange the alphabet to put U between F and CK.

Everyone has an inner freak waiting to come out and play. Freaky pickup lines can be a fun way to let your freak flag fly and find that special person who will salute it. 

Spicy Pick up Lines

  • Are you a firefighter? Because you found me hot but left me wet.
  • Are your legs sore at all? Don’t worry; as long as I have a face, you’ll always have someplace to sit.
  • You’re like Medusa; I’m rock-hard because of you.
  • The single reason I would ever kick you out of bed would be to have my way with you on the floor.
  • We have to do our part to fight climate change. Let’s shower together to save water.
  • I’m craving to kiss your beautiful, luscious lips . . . and then afterward, the ones on your face.
  • I have an aching headache. I’ve heard that the best cure for headaches is wild, passionate sex. Want to go upstairs and create a remedy?
  • I’m not a meteorologist; however, I am expecting a couple more inches tonight.
  • Okay, I’m here. What are your last two wishes?

Spicy and sexy pick up lines are great because of their utility. You can use them when first meeting someone, while you’re casual dating, or even if you’re in a relationship. 

Hot Pick up Lines

  • I want to put you on like sunglasses . . . a leg over each ear.
  • Your clothes are making me feel incredibly uncomfortable. Mind if we take them off?
  • If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
  • Are you an iceberg? Because you make me want to go down.
  • Your hair would look really good . . . in my lap.
  • I’m an adventure seeker; can I explore your cave?
  • My magical watch is telling me that you’re not wearing panties. Wait, you are? Oh, it must be an hour ahead.
  • When do you get off? Can I watch?
  • You’re not a fan of casual sex? No problem, let me put on my tux, and we’ll make it more formal.

Hot pickup lines can stir your lust and awaken your passion for someone. The best part is that they can be used in many contexts to build sexual anticipation and keep your target eagerly awaiting your next date night.

Nasty Pick up Lines

  • I know you don’t go to church often. But you’ll be on your knees tonight.
  • I want you to poke my belly button . . . from the inside.
  • I would share a joke with you about my penis; however, it’s too long.
  • I’m not a windshield repairman, but I can fill in your crack.
  • You look amazing in that dress, but I think you’d look even better in your birthday suit

Nasty pickup lines are a lot like freaky pickup lines. However, the key difference is that nasty pickup lines are best suited for when you’re a bit more familiar with the person you plan to use them on.

Horny Pick up Lines

  • That’s a beautiful dress. Can I talk you out of it?
  • Yeah, I’d definitely have sex with me if I were you.
  • Are you religious? Because you’re the answer to all my prayers.
  • Touch my shirt. It’s made of the finest, most exceptional fabric; they call it boyfriend material.
  • If being in love was a felony, I’d make you my partner in crime.
  • Was your father a boxer? Because you’re a knockout!
  • I’m good with numbers. I’ll prove it to you; give me yours. 
  • Do you like games? Yes? Awesome! Let’s have a round of hide the salami.
  • Hi there, I’m Mr. Right. Were you looking for me?

Let’s face it: Sometimes you just want it, and you want it now. You can communicate your desire through these horny pickup lines. 

Risky Pick up Lines

  • I’m like a snowflake: stunningly beautiful, one of a kind, and you can feel how wet I am with a single touch.
  • You have the look of a cold, refreshing glass of water, and I’m incredibly thirsty.
  • You look chilly. Would you like to use me as a blanket?
  • Are you employed at Dick's? Because it seems like you're sporting the equipment.
  • Tie your shoes up; I don't want you falling for anybody else.
  • This is not a beer belly; it's a fuel reservoir that powers this love machine.

Risky pickup lines are used for the sole purpose of demonstrating confidence in a fun and flirty way. The risqué aspect of these pickup lines comes from the absurdity of the content. However, when said the right way at the right time, well-placed dirty pick up lines can be incredibly effective for building attraction and having fun. 

Seductive Pick up Lines for Him or Her

  • Today, I was feeling off, but you just turned me back on.
  • It’s often said that kissing is the language of love; would you mind having a conversation with me?
  • I’m a burglar . . . and I’m going to break through your back door.
  • Am I on a Home Improvement episode? Because I don’t think I’ve ever seen hard wood like that in my life.

If you’re feeling particularly sensuous, the seductive dirty pick up line is the ideal choice. These are great because of the innuendo. You’re saying what you want without actually saying what you want. As a result, the recipient is left to read between the lines, imagining all the dirty details.

Conclusion

The best thing about dirty pick up lines is that you have so many variations to choose from. As long as you know how to read a room, you can pick one best suited for the situation. The rest is up to you. 

I can give you the supplies, but if you’re to be a pickup artist, the delivery is up to you. May the odds be ever in your favor.

Need some more tips and advice on being in a relationship? Click the link!

Author

  • Alex Brown is a self-improvement freelance writer. He writes blog posts and articles for various companies geared toward personal growth and self-development.

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