{"id":476,"date":"2022-06-21T11:24:46","date_gmt":"2022-06-21T11:24:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/breakthecycle.org\/real-stories-my-feminist-hero\/"},"modified":"2024-04-13T21:50:32","modified_gmt":"2024-04-13T21:50:32","slug":"real-stories-my-feminist-hero","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/blog\/real-stories-my-feminist-hero\/","title":{"rendered":"Real Stories: My Feminist Hero"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Please note: Entries within this blog may contain references to instances of domestic abuse, dating abuse, sexual assault, abuse or harassment. At all times, Break the Cycle encourages readers to take whatever precautions necessary to protect themselves emotionally and psychologically.\u00a0 If you would like to speak with an advocate, please contact a 24\/7 peer advocate at\u00a0<\/span>866-331-9474<\/a>\u00a0 or text “loveis” to 22522.<\/i><\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

Real Stories: My Feminist Hero<\/div>\n
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This is Real Stories – a blog by\u00a0Let’s Be Real<\/a>\u00a0members about their experiences with relationships, dating, and more. LBR is a movement by young people for young people about relationships.<\/h2>\n

Feminism: the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes<\/em><\/p>\n

Intersectionality: the oppression and discrimination resulting from the overlap of an individual\u2019s various social identities, such as race, class, ethnicity, gender identity, etc.<\/em><\/p>\n

Since I grew up with feminism as part of my socialization, it was a concept I always thought I \u00a0understood well. It wasn\u2019t until the summer after my freshman year of college that feminism became a defining portion of my life. Sure, I would read articles about the theory on Facebook, nod, and ask myself why people didn\u2019t seem to get it…but at that point, I didn\u2019t understand the history that feminism has and how complex its effects are in the world. At that point, I wasn\u2019t thinking about the intersectionality that feminism needs in order to be true feminism. Until I needed feminism personally, I held the mindset of a privileged white feminist, who didn\u2019t understand how very important it is for people in general, but especially for women.<\/p>\n

The summer after my freshman year of college I was sexually assaulted at a party. The story is like so many others, so I don\u2019t feel the need to get into details, but my assault awoke my inner feminist, a side that I had not previously tapped into. Part of that awakening came from reading the book, Asking For It<\/em><\/a>, written by Kate Harding<\/a>. This book fearlessly and sharply points out the blatant examples of rape culture that exist in the United States. It addresses the lack of support given to survivors in their communities, as well as ways we can work to change this and the multiple other issues survivors face in our society.<\/p>\n

Reading this book only months after my assault was extremely hard. At times, I had to step away from the book for my own self-care, but in its pages I learned so much. It taught me that it is safe, valid and acceptable to address gender issues in a no-nonsense way. It helped me realize that the circumstances that have severe impact on survivors, like reporting and your reputation<\/strong>, often have little consequences for assailants. That is because society\u2019s response to sexual assault is affected by gender, race, sexual history and more. For example, women of color are often stereotypically over-sexualized, so when survivors of color report their assault, some people are not supportive because they think they \u201cbrought it on themselves\u201d with their sexuality. Young men are seen as sexually insatiable, so often when a guy reports sexual assault, his \u201cmasculinity\u201d is questioned and his experience is brushed off as something he should have enjoyed. Seeing these examples for myself and reading them on the pages in Asking For It, I began to understand the role of intersectionality in feminism. The lesson that every situation in life is changed by the intersection of identities is applicable not only to sexual assault, but everyday life too.<\/p>\n

Knowing this, my eyes were opened to the other feminist inspirations around me: my mom and dad; my grandmother, who was the first woman to take elevated math classes in Jersey City; my strong and inspirational friends; my brothers and sisters who are also survivors of sexual assault; \u00a0former President Obama and former Vice President Biden; Beyonce; Samantha Bee; ; bell hooks; Hillary Rodham Clinton; Chimamanda Adichie; U.S. Senator Claire McCaskill; Ida B. Wells; Gloria Steinem; Dorothy Pitman-Hughes; and hundreds more.<\/p>\n

I always believed in the concept of feminism, but I was blinded to the fact that I actually needed it<\/em> until it became personal. Feminism benefits everyone in different ways, whether or not you see it, and the idea that someone doesn\u2019t need feminism is based in privilege. As a white, heterosexual, cisgender woman, I need to learn to check my privilege and open myself to learn about experiences I will never have. My assault shed a light on why I needed feminism, and Harding\u2019s book taught me why others need it too. I feel as though this lesson is so important, and isn\u2019t discussed as much as it should be. It is a lesson that I am constantly learning.<\/p>\n

Now more than ever we, as a nation, need to truly understand feminism. When we leave people of color, men, the LGBTQ* community, or anyone else out of the feminist narrative, it is no longer feminism. Now is the time for us all to be allies. Kate Harding helped me to start understanding this, opening my mind to so many new ideas, which is why she is my feminist hero.<\/p>\n

This blog was contributed by Brigid Burke, a Let’s Be Real<\/a> member, former Break the Cycle intern, and current student. She also wrote our post on Women’s History Month<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/article>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Please note: Entries within this blog may contain references to instances of domestic abuse, dating … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":600,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/476"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=476"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/476\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4732,"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/476\/revisions\/4732"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/600"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=476"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}