{"id":162,"date":"2022-06-21T11:23:07","date_gmt":"2022-06-21T11:23:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/breakthecycle.org\/cycle_of_violence\/"},"modified":"2023-12-14T21:11:39","modified_gmt":"2023-12-14T21:11:39","slug":"cycle_of_violence","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/cycle_of_violence\/","title":{"rendered":"Tension Building"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"content\">\n<h1><\/h1>\n<div id=\"topnav\">\n<ul>\n<li class=\"first\">The Cycle of Violence<\/li>\n<li>Types of Abuse<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"\/about_abuse\/about_dv\/\">About Domestic Violence<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"\/about_abuse\/about_teendv\/\">About Teen Dating Violence<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"\/about_abuse\/dv_faq\/\">Domestic Violence FAQ<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n<h2>The Cycle of Violence<\/h2>\n<p class=\"o877gxqusjkh4ofpr\">In most abusive relationships violence is not a one time incident. The abuse<br \/>\nusually happens again and again. While not all victims experience the same thing,<br \/>\nmany find that the abuse occurs in a repeating cycle with three phases: tension<br \/>\nbuilding, explosion, and honeymoon stages. Each phase can be as short as a few<br \/>\nseconds or as long as several years.<\/p>\n<h3 align=\"center\">Tension Building<\/h3>\n<blockquote>\n<blockquote>\n<p class=\"o877gxqusjkh4ofpr\">Things start to get tense between you and the person you&#8217;re with. The<br \/>\nwarning signs of abuse start to appear. Often:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>You argue a lot.<\/li>\n<li>The person you are with yells at you for no reason.<\/li>\n<li>He or she makes false accusations against you.<\/li>\n<li>You feel like you can&#8217;t do anything right.<\/li>\n<li>You feel tension, like things could blow up at any moment.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/blockquote>\n<\/blockquote>\n<table>\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td valign=\"bottom\" width=\"25%\">\n<h3>Honeymoon<\/h3>\n<p class=\"o877gxqusjkh4ofpr\">The abuser will try to get you to stay by apologizing, trying<br \/>\nto make up with you, and trying to shift the blame for the<br \/>\nexplosion to someone or something else.<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<td align=\"center\" valign=\"top\"><\/td>\n<td align=\"right\" valign=\"bottom\" width=\"25%\">\n<h3>Explosion<\/h3>\n<p class=\"o877gxqusjkh4ofpr\">All of the tension that has been built up is released in an outburst<br \/>\nof violence that can include intense emotional, verbal,<br \/>\nsexual and\/or physical abuse.<\/p>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<table>\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td align=\"left\" valign=\"top\" width=\"40%\">\n<p class=\"o877gxqusjkh4ofpr\">The abuser often:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Says &#8220;I love you.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>Apologizes and promises that it will never happen again.<\/li>\n<li>Buys you flowers or other gifts.<\/li>\n<li>Makes excuses.<\/li>\n<li>Says that you did something to cause the abuse or blames it on<br \/>\nother things, like being drunk or stressed out.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/td>\n<td><\/td>\n<td valign=\"top\" width=\"40%\">\n<p align=\"right\">The abuser may:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Physically abuse you by hitting, kicking, slamming you against the wall,<br \/>\netc.<\/li>\n<li>Scream and yell in a way that scares or humiliates you.<\/li>\n<li>Rape or force you to go further sexually than you want to.<\/li>\n<li>Threaten to hurt you.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p class=\"o877gxqusjkh4ofpr\">If your relationship looks like this, you may see the tension start to build<br \/>\nagain after the honeymoon stage, eventually leading to another explosion. Over<br \/>\ntime, the honeymoon stage can get shorter and gradually disappear, and the explosions<br \/>\ncan become more violent and dangerous.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The Cycle of Violence Types of Abuse About Domestic Violence About Teen Dating Violence Domestic &#8230; <a title=\"Tension Building\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/cycle_of_violence\/\" aria-label=\"More on Tension Building\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/162"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=162"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/162\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3989,"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/162\/revisions\/3989"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.breakthecycle.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=162"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}